What is the G-Spot?
Well, thatโs actually a big debate. So letโs talk about what people generally mean when they say โg-spotโ. The term, named after German gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg, was made popular in the 1980s. Itโs about 2 inches up the front wall of the vagina (the same side as your belly button, not your back). Originally it was thought to be about a 1 inch square sized bit of flesh.
The first people to write about the G-spot said that it caused intense vaginal orgasms, and, in some cases, โfemale ejaculationโ, where, at orgasm, you suddenly โsquirtโ some liquid. Many women are afraid when this happens that they just peed; not at all. Itโs a totally different fluid. This has been documented for hundreds of years in some pretty scary old medical books for some pretty scary treatments (as you can imagine), but thereโs no doubt that it can happen.
All kinds of articles were written to try to teach women how to locate their G-spot. Sex toys were made that would do this. Womenโs magazines in the 1990s and early 2000s routinely wrote articles about this โnewโ thing which had just been learned, and helping women try to reach new heights of pleasure.
The problem was that a lot of women couldnโt find a specific spot. They were reading all these articles saying, โItโs there! You should find it!โ But sex itself didnโt seem to be able to stimulate it. So researchers jumped in the game and tried to find a specific spot, too. They couldnโt, and when they released their study saying that the G-spot didnโt exist, they got all kinds of pushback from women saying, โbut it does! I can feel it!โ
The Truth
What researchers now believe is that the G-spot isnโt a specific spot, as much as it is a region on the front wall of vagina, on the other side of the urethral sponge (which is often why sex can feel better when you have to go to the bathroom a little bit). And the G-spot is not a separate entity, but rather the result of โrootsโ of the clitoris. They think that the clitoris, that little โbulbโ or โbuttonโ of flesh in front of the urethra, in the vulva (so between your two folds of skin on your vulva) has โlegsโ or roots that extend up the front wall of the vagina when aroused, and that this can cause far more intense orgasms than just the clitoris alone.
Some women seem to be far more sensitive in that area than others, and it seems to be due to the thickness of the tissue in the area. But itโs something science is still trying to figure out.
Hereโs an anatomical illustration to show you:
Going on a G-Hunt!
I figure it can be a pretty fun research project for the two of you! No one should feel like they have to find a G-spot, or that theyโre somehow inadequate if they donโt. And remember that even women who do say they have one often have a difficult time experiencing orgasm through โmissionaryโ position sex, because the penis just isnโt putting pressure on the right place at the right angle.
Want to see if you can find yours? Try out this sexy homework:
- This works best after you’re already a bit aroused, so get your foreplay on.
- Lay on your back with your knees bent and legs spread.
- Have your husband sit between your legs.
- Have him gently insert a finger into your vagina (use some lube if you want)
- The husband gently pushes against the top part of your vagina (facing your belly button). Feel around and see if one spot feels better than others.
Read on for a few more techniques.
Come Hither
The g-spot is actually much more than a little spot. Think of her g-spot as a cluster of โrootsโ embedded in her โsoilโ of erectile tissue in the roof of her vagina near its opening. The โrootsโ are part of the internal mass of her clitoris. The Come-Hither Clasp manual stimulation technique is a great way to stimulate her g-spot.
Using the Come-Hither Clasp Manual Stimulation Technique
Before you go any further, there is one VERY important prerequisite to this technique. She needs to be very aroused before you attempt to stimulate her g-spot. If sheโs not very aroused you wonโt be able to stimulate her g-spot. The spongy erectile tissue in the g-spot area needs to be engorged with blood before her clitoral โrootsโ can be stimulated. Most people who have tried finding the g-spot and failed probably didnโt take the time and effort for proper arousal. We have plenty of cunnilingus techniques (read our blog post about it!) that will help you get her ready for awesome g-spot stimulation.
- Start by inserting your straight index finger with your palm up into her vagina about 3 inches. You shouldnโt need lube because she should be very aroused already.
- Gently graze her vaginal ceiling with the tip of your index fingertip in a โcome-hitherโ gesture. As you do so, you will feel a slightly different texture of engorged spongy material.
- After several โcome-hitherโ gestures, increase the pressure being applied to her g-spot.
You can also use the Come-Hither Clasp manual stimulation technique while sheโs laying flat on her belly. Instead of your palm facing up, it should be facing down into the bed when sheโs laying on her belly.
From Behind
Many sex positions are a great way to stimulate her G-spot (the back side of her clitoris) with your penis.
Begin by getting on all fours and invite your husband to enter you from behind. Have him slowly thrust while you adjust your upper body at different angles and move your hips up and down to find the right angle that feels great.
Conclusion
Although there’s been a lot of myths about the g-spot, there is a cluster of “roots” from your clitoris that feel great in the right context. Take some time with your partner to discover another beautiful place to give pleasure.
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