I believe we need stronger marriages now in this world more than ever! I also believe, and a lot of research supports this[1], that the fastest way to strengthen a marriage is by improving the sexual connection.
In saying that, I recognize that what constitutes a healthy sexual connection will look differently from one person to another. As the joke goes, for men, “do you want to connect?” is synonymous with sex ,while for women, a bid for connection can be found through many activities (not limited to just sex).
Yet sex plays a powerful, divinely-designed role in the special marriage relationship. That being said, some couples find it difficult to connect sexually due to a number of reasons.
One woman in our Get Your Marriage On Program recently shared the following insight.
She says, “…Then I found something that was a real game changer for me—asking myself ‘What can I say Yes to.’
“What can I say Yes to? And thinking about that question during the day. What can I say yes to tonight when my husband and I have some time together? Most of the time my Yes looked totally different from my husband’s.
“For example, I love to just snuggle without it necessarily leading to anything. I could say yes to that. But even just putting a show on for the kids to get some time for us to talk, or going on a walk in the park and talking about our day. Or holding each other while playing my favorite game on our phones—Rummikub. That was creating intimacy.
“When my husband could understand that intimacy was more than just sex and I could express and be proactive about creating the kind of intimacy I wanted, then my sexual desire showed up more. And I started saying Yes to the sex part too, for ME not just for him and Us.”
Give it a try tonight!
